Can we Just Let Grandma Die? I Mean if She Wants To.

Mom is 86 years old. Dad has been dead for years. The house got sold a long time ago and what little assetts mom had she already gave to the grandchildren. Mom lived with my brother for many years and for the most part it was good.

After she beat breast cancer she wanted her own place so we got her in assisted living. She only fell a couple times during those three years. We worried and family checked on her often. Then she started falling more often. Once a month on the average we found she had fell at night and injured herself.  She often failed to answer the phone sometimes because she left off her hearing aid. Sometimes she had fell and couldn’t get up. Once the police had to break down the door and found her naked in the bathtub.

The turning point was the stroke.  That is when we realized she needed 24/7 attention. She had to go to “The Home.”  Mom put up a big fuss and if she had had her own money she would have stayed out of the home.  She could have hired a nurse or something. But being broke and her kids just making ends meet left mom with one option.

There was no long term care insurance so we signed mom up for Medicaid. She gets her room and board at the home. Social Security won’t give her any more money and she gets to keep about $20.00 a month for herself. All her medicine, doctor visits, hospital bills and surgeries are paid by the government. Remember U.S. Us we pay for hips, knees, lungs, medicine, lots and lots of medicine to keep grandma alive.

No one in our family can afford to insure mom or even pay deductables much less the cost of the home.  So there she sits mostly unhappy with nothing to do but watch TV and hang out with a bunch of other crabby old folks. She is beginning to show signs of her dementia worsening. So what is in her future? Probably heart trouble. How much will that cost?

I love mom but she is not happy. I have no money to do anything for her. I wonder how long the government will keep fixing her. I wonder how many other moms are just waiting to die? What does it cost taxpayers to heal all these moms?

If a family has plenty of money they can do what they want. But when there is no money maybe we should just keep grandma medicated so she is happy and out of pain and let nature take it’s course.

I am getting older and wonder if I will end up where mom is.  When I reach 85 and start loosing it mentally should Medicaid pay for a back operation, or a heart operation?

I will say I wish medical care and health insurance was less expensive and less confusing. I wish there was an unlimited supply of doctors medicine and money.

I think we need a dollar limit. Health, age mental soundness could play a part in the termination of benifits, but reaching a dollar limit is the best way to determine when hope is gone.  Maybe there should be an appeals process.

God it sounds so cruel. Could I wish this for myself?  Could I wish this for a spouse or some other loved one?  Do I want mom to have a few more years or just keep her comfy and let her die?  I see rationed care coming for America. I guess I am just prepareing mentally to cope with my future. Can you accept this out come for you and your loved ones? If you are young you can start socking away money now. If you are near 60 years old like me consider the possibilities.  What else can I do if I run out of money?  What will happen when the government runs out of money?